Bottom in a gay relationship
What Does “Top” Mean?
In the context of gay relationships and sexual dynamics, terms such as “top”, “bottom”, “verse” and “side” are often used to explain a person’s sexual preferences and roles. It is vital to knowing these terms not only for members of the LGBTQ+ group, but also for increasing understanding and acceptance of gender non-conforming relationships in society.
What Does “Top” Mean?Physical AspectsEmotional and Psychological AspectsCommunication and ConsentWhat Does “Bottom” Mean?Physical AspectsEmotional and Psychological AspectsThe Stigma Around Being a BottomWhat Does “Verse” Mean?Accepting DiversityCommunication and CompatibilityWhat Does “Side” Mean?Non-Penetrative IntimacyOpposing NormsAccepting One’s IdentityRoles and MythsHealth and Safety During Gay Sex
As a rule, in male lover sexual relationships, the “top” is the partner who has a penetrative role during anal sex. However, the notion of top includes much more than just physical actions: it includes a whole set of attitudes, preferences, and sometimes emotional roles.
Physical Aspects
In physical terms, the t
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We can aid you become a excel bottom! Here are some quick bottoming tips and tricks from ACON’s peer-workshop Booty Basics.
1. Lube
The arse does not produce its own lubrication.
This means that lube is really, really important for any anal play. First, to cease damage to the internal lining of your arse. Second, to make bottoming (and topping!) more pleasurable. And third, to serve protect it from infections.
Remember to use water or silicon-based lubes, as oil-based lubes can damage condoms.
2. You
The second principle is YOU. This is the one that covers off all the mental and emotional aspects such as making sure you undergo safe, making sure there is consent, that you feel comfortable, that you know your own bottoming limits and desires.
Remember, sex is best for everyone if all the people involved are motivated by trying to maximise everyone’s pleasure safely. You can’t be a good companion and you c
Troye Sivan said he's a 'verse' during sex, not a 'top' or 'bottom.' Here's what the terms mean.
Troye Sivan, a singer known for his footpath "Bloom," recently set direct rumors that he only enjoys receiving penetration during sex.
"I think in the sort of consciousness of gay people I'm some crazy power bottom or something, which is just not the case, and I just wanted to put that out there," Sivan, a gay dude, said on Emily Ratajkowski's podcast "High Low."
Sivan said that he's a "verse," meaning he enjoys both penetrating a partner and being penetrated during sex.
"Verse," as well as the terms "top" and "bottom" are popular ways to describe sexual preferences in the queer community.
While the terms were originally used to describe the sexual preferences of queer men in the s, more LGBTQ+ people have adopted the terms to chat about what they prefer in sex.
Lately, top/bottom/verse discourse has grown more evident on TikTok, where gay people have been making videos describing the one-of-a-kind struggles of each preference.
It's impo
What a “bottom” means in vanilla sex
Much like how a superior in specifically queer sex is someone who takes on the role of doing or carrying out sexual actions to the other person, a bottom is someone who is “passive” in that they’re on the “receiving end” of sex. If the sex they’re having involves penetration, a bottom is generally being penetrated by a top. Of course, not all sex involves penetration, but in very broad and oversimplified terms, the top is someone who does in sex, and the bottom is someone who is done to.
Sometimes calling it a more “passive” role gives the impression that bottoms do nothing in bed, or are lazy or selfish — like the term “pillow princess” when used derisively. This shouldn’t be assumed; queer sex is more than penetration, and bottoms can often be incredibly active sex partners. The concept of being a bottom isn’t about being inactive; it’s about deriving pleasure from allowing someone else to lead the sex acts involved, much as a superior gets off on pleasing someone else.
It’s especially important to recall not to conflate bottoming with selfishness o